15 February, 2008 (5:33am) - 2 March, 2008 (3:52am)
This thread takes place during the Valentine's Day dance at school. There's a little cupid monster who is either making people hate each other or can make someone fall in love, and that's what he does here.
Link.
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Aife pulled the piles of discarded clothes away from her bead, attempting to get a good reach at Dorian, who was hugging the wall below the frame, his paws clamped onto one of her heels. Normally, she would have left him there to guard the shoe- it wasn't as if he gnawed at his treasures. But not tonight, for she couldn't very well show up at the dance in a pair of flip flops. The way cleared, and she lunged under the bed, and grabbed the heel as Dorian shot off toward the open door. She pulled her head out just as his silvery tail disappeared beyond the frame.
"That damn cat..." she muttered as she dusted off the shoes. Making a mental note to clean beneath her bed, Aife pulled herself onto her feet and made her way to her wardrobe. She picked over the piles, the books, and the brooms that lay across the messy floor. Her mental check list added a group cleaning session to her growing list.
A black canvas bag peeped out of her closet, it's length ran over the drawers and below the open doors. She pulled it out and, laying it carefully across her bed, untied the closure at it's front. Earlier that week, her mother's owl, Cilia, had flown in through her open window- much to Dorian's dismay- and dropped a large package on her bed. It contained her outfit for the dance, and was just in time. She'd been immensely surprised when her new-found friend, Caelen, invited her, and had rushed Basil off to her mother, proclaiming the need for a gown and heels. She now opened the covering with more care- the ties were wrinkled from being unfastened and refastened throughout the week, to show the gown to her girlfriends. She lay the garment flush across her bed and crossed to the mirror hanging inside her wardrobe.
Her reflection appeared before her, fresh from a shower, and her hair hung in damp ringlets. Aife muttered a few spells, in the order and inflections that the Potion's professor had suggested early that day, which would supposedly apply a soft flush of makeup, and a simple up do. Her hair moved silently into place, and, sure enough, soft colours surfaced in all the right places across her features. I'll have to remember those on busy mornings... she thought.
A pair of pearl earrings lay on her desk, atop her school books. Aife lifted them, careful not to drop the miniature stubs and pinned them to her lobes. Her dress lay undisturbed, and she donned it carefully, cautious not to tear the dress, or snag it's zipper. The golden heels were the hardest part, and she perched on the edge of her bed to fasten the thin straps around her ankles. They were higher than she was used to, but the straps and wide soles helped her balance, along with an anti-slipping spell her mother had administered before she'd sent them.
Aife moved to her mirror again, and examined her reflection. The simple design of the gown complemented her slight figure, and the colouring was a few shades darker than her ivory skin. She figured that she made up enough for colour with her flame coloured hair, while the simple pearl studs did nothing to take away from the modest beauty of her gown. She nodded with content at her likeness, who seemed to stand much more confident than she felt.
Finally, deciding that she was as read as she'd ever be, Aife grabbed her gold beaded clutch and walked out the door. Taking her time on the stairs, she lifted the hem of her skirt so as not to step on it. She was relieved when she made it to the last step unscathed, and walked quickly through the common room and out into the hall.
Students bustled about, making their way to the dining hall where the dance was being held. They all looked very smart in their attire, and many of the boys had cleaned up for the occasion, though some sported some rather untraditional suits. Aife made her way down the stair case, hugging the wall for support, her hem gathered in her free hand. She was to meet Caelen in the entrance hall, and when she landed at the foot of the grand staircase, she moved quickly out of the way of the descending students.
Safe behind the banister, she used her location to search for her friend. She stood on her toes, the soles of her heels bending with her, to scan the crowd. Many of her aquaintences occupied the throng flowing into the hall, and she waved to the few who noticed her in her removed location. The crowd of students proceeding down the stairs was more sparse now, than when she'd left it. She glanced at the boys' faces, skipping the shorter ones, or the ones with darker hair. Don't worry... she told herself. There is still more than enough time for him to come...
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Caelen paced the space of his bedroom quickly as he tried to calm his nerves. His roommates were long gone, almost 30 minutes ago, they got very annoyed at his pacing and left to meet their dates and still here he was. Instead of rushing down to the entrance hall like all the others he stood walking back and forth and cursing at himself. It was time for the Valentines day dance, actual time for it, he was sure everyone had arrived into the dining hall by now and here he was still pacing and waisting time.
He couldn't get a grip on himself and though he was dressed and groomed and ready to leave he couldn't step outside the bedroom. He was sure his date was there by now and that unnerved him more, it was his first time in a long time, since he's been turned actually, going out with a human girl. Well it was just a dance of course, he wasn't going to be alone with her so he thought he'd be able to handle it but he was deadly wrong. Ever since he was turned he tried to avoid events such as this and now he managed to get himself a date to a dance, the most social event of the school and many other humans were going to attend.
Caelen sighed muttering himself lowly as he continued walking back and forth, he tried to remember what exactly he was thinking when he asked her out. Nothing came to him and he cursed at himself again. He wanted to feel normal again, human again, so he wanted to attend the Valentines day dance and since she was still available he asked her. Now he was regretting the fact as he was afraid he was going to ruin the dance for her, he could control himself around the scent of human blood to a degree and to be around so many students at once was going to be a nightmare.
He stopped in front of the door in his room one more time and reached for the doorknob and stopped. With another sigh he ran his hand through his hair quickly and looked towards the ceiling as if searching for an answer. He really couldn't remember when the last time he was so nervous, though most of it came from him being afraid that he'll become overwhelmed and end up ruining the dance for Aife. It was that thought that made him unable to leave his room. He took a deep breath and walked towards the mirror to look at his appearance, the creme tux he was wearing made his pale complexion not look so sickly and he was glad, he wanted to avoid anything that could make it easy for someone to pinpoint what he was. Though the trouble again was his eyes, he actually considered finding a spell to temporarily glamour his eyes into a different color but he remembered Aife already saw them as a deep dark brown so he left it be.
He told himself that everything would be fine and and he'd try to not breathe without being noticed as much as he could, he repeated the words in his head like a mantra and with another deep sigh he walked forward quickly and exited the room before he could change his mind. Caelen hurried down the stairs and exited the common room quickly to meet her at the entrance hall. He looked at the passing students and smiled happily as he was feeling a little more comfortable, he thought maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all and wide smile became plastered on his face.
He descended the grand staircase quickly, looking down at the students walking by to search for her when he caught her scent. He had imprinted it into his memory as it was much easier to locate someone that way, she saw standing behind the banister tiptoeing too look for him and he grinned deciding to surprise her. Caelen took a breath to calm himself and with his vampire speed ran down the stairs to appear by her side, as he was nothing more than a blur or strange burst of wind to the humans around them. He stood some steps behind her looking her over before speaking.
"You look stunning" He said in a calm voice that showed nothing of his previous nervousness and he was right. The dress complimented her perfectly as it flowed long down her body and the color matched her tone beautifully. He couldn't help looking at her as she turned to face him and he took in the details of her appearance, her flaming red hair made her beauty stand out even more and the light pink color of her face seemed to draw his eyes and he was having difficulty tearing his gaze from her. "I'm sorry I kept you waiting long..." He started and stopped suddenly as he couldn't really think of an excuse to give her. "Shall we?" Caelen spoke with a grin as he offered his arm to her and nodded towards the dining room.
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Aife scanned the thinning crowd, searching for her date among the resplendent throng. Presently unnoticed, she pulled herself onto a nearby bench to get a better look. She still couldn't find him. There was still a flush of students descending the staircase, though, so she hopped down and resigned herself to waiting, and casting her glance idly through the stream of students. A breeze wafted through the hall, causing the ringlets that drifted from the spell's confines to stir. Chills ran down her spine, and she wrapped her arms around her. Why didn't I think to bring a shawl... she thought.
You look stunning. Aife froze, the voice startled her for a moment, until she descried the soft, articulate timbre of her friend. She turned, laughing at her surprise. As soon as she beheld his frame, dressed smartly in a suit of creme, her breath caught in her throat. The colour suited him, complementing his flawless skin. Words flashed across her mind as she attempted to form her complement. Brilliant... Heavenly... Devastating... She shook her head, clearing the thoughts away, and looked up into his face. "Caelen... you look..." She paused, deciding on a fitting description. "Sensational." She grinned, pleased with her choice. Her gaze locked on his face, noting his dark, chocolate eyes and the glorious way in which they stood out from his milky complexion.
Her head shook in slow response to his apologies. "It is quite all right, I was able to see everyone's outfits before they entered the hall", she said, and tried to push aside the relief she felt in his presence. She didn't really think that he wouldn't show- it was only nervousness readily felt in the shadow of the coming evening. Her keen regard drifted downward as he offered his arm to her. "Shall we?" he inquired. She felt her lips curve in a smile as she hooked her arm through his and lay her slender hand on his sleeve. "Of course", she said, her head tilting as she looked up at him.
He started off, leading her through the high, arched doors to the dance hall. It was thoroughly decorated- right down to the glittery red hearts and fizzing sparklers that stood out in the floral garlands that draped the walls. Some students occupied the tables, and even fewer the dance floor, but most made their way around the hall, exclaiming excitedly over their friends outfits. Girls whispered in each other's ears, boys gave their friends knowing looks, their eyebrows arching dramatically, and the teachers moved about, watching for any type of unwanted displays.
Aife's eyes returned to Caelen, whom she was sure stood out prominently amongst the black and red clad gentlemen. "Would you like to sit?" she asked. "Or not..." She wasn't sure what his preference would be- she was still getting to know him, and wasn't positive as to how he performed in crowds. "I don't care what we do, really..." she ventured. "Though I feel a little silly just standing here." Her gaze roamed the hall, looking for Lunette and Rue. She'd been so excited when Lune dished the previous night about her encounter with Rue, and they'd hardly fallen asleep by dawn, causing them to sleep through their day. Positive that she'd see them before the night was over, she returned her attention to her handsome date and waited for a response.
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It was like a smorgusborg! The Cupidon was in a mischevious heaven, to be sure! It wasted no time in finding various victims, and all of them were dressed up and ready for some awkwardness. What was more awkward than a dance? Plenty of singles and too many disgusting little couples! Soon the Cupidon found a little redhead and her date, and everything seemed to spell out a-w-k-w-a-r-d. Quickly the Cupidon flew down and bit the boy on the shoulder blade through his clothes, allowing the venom of L O V E to course through his veins. Who said the Cupidon wasn't nice?
Okay, so its current niceness could have had something to do with the variety of sweets that were laid out in the dance hall, but the Cupdion would never admit to that.
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Caelen managed to keep his worries to a minimum as the seconds went by. He's actually managed to stop counting the seconds away as he slowly tried to even his breathing. His earlier plan of not breathing was seemed doom to fail as he couldn't really explain to her why he wasn't breathing, he wanted to keep that little fact from her for as long as he possibly could. There was no need to scare her he thought, he didn't want to ruin what might possibly be a friendship by revealing to her that he was a monster. Caelen shook the thoughts out of his head as he decided to just focus on remembering to breathe and being normal.
She smiled and hooked her arm through his affectionately and rested her hand on his sleeve. He tried to not panic at their closeness and gave her a charming smile when she looked up at him and started walking forward. "I feel honored to be escorting the Belle of the ball" Caelen spoke with a smile and the sentence reminded him of a muggle story one of his muggle born friends told him, Beauty and the Beast he believed it was called and the beauty's name was Belle. Caelen had his silent laugh at the thought when they entered the dance hall and he looked around quickly. The large hall was filled with students already, many of them bustling around in groups whispering to each other, the dance floor was almost empty as everyone stood against the walls or occupied the tables.
Aife turned to look at him and spoke and Caelen turned his attention towards her. He looked around the room again and let out a breath. He was doing well so far, the only thing that was being a bother was the smell of everyone's perfume or cologne mixed together, it irritated him a bit but it was nothing he couldn't handle. He was about to answer her when the small fluttering of wings distracted him, Caelen looked around quickly for the source not seeing anything but felt a hard bite at his shoulder. He let out a small hissing sound from the pain and turned his head slightly to look at his shoulder. There was nothing there, not even the teeth marks but he knew what he felt. He sighed as the fluttering went away and a look of confusion crossed his face, he turned to look at Aife and felt a strange warmth flow through his body.
His eyes became glued to her face as he felt like he was seeing her again for the first time, he couldn't look away from her as he took in the details of her face from the magnificent color of her eyes to the pink color of her lips. He continued looking at her as all noises and scents of the room disappeared and there was only him and her and the sweet smell of what he assumed to be either her blood or perfume, he couldn't differentiate, and the feel of her arm linked around his. He took a breath to clear his mind of his new found fascination with her before answering.
"I... yes we can sit" Caelen spoke stammering over his words for what was the first time in... he couldn't even remember but he was sure it was before he even became a teenager. "Anything you want" Caelen said once he calmed himself and looked at her smiling brightly, and he meant it. He had the strongest urge to do whatever it took to make her happy and please her, now more than ever he was determined to make the night perfect for her. He thought he was right along his way with the plan since everyone else in the room was unnoticeable by him and the only person he cared about was his Aife.
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Aife's eyes widened as her date turned swiftly, catching her off guard. "Are you all right?" she asked him, her arm pressing firmly to his sleeve. The hiss that emerged from his lips made her pause, and she waited for him to turn toward her. When he did so, she studied his face; the crumpled expression that occupied it disappeared quickly and was replaced with his normally smooth demeanor. She grinned up at him, her eyes scanning his. He looked down at her, his head bent slightly, his eyes unwavering.
After a few moments of the rigid attention, Aife was about to repeat her question when he replied. I... yes, we can sit, he said. His speech alarmed her... she wasn't sure if, in the short time she'd known him, she'd ever heard him stumble over his words. She groaned at his next statement. "I am absolutely horrible with decisions", she told him, enunciating the adjective. "So I hope you don't mind making them." She smiled at him as they made their way through the throng to an empty table. It was draped with a white table cloth, and a bouquet and candles decorated it's middle.
Caelen pulled out her chair as they approached, and Aife sat, smoothing her skirt over her knees. She looked around the hall. "Everyone looks so nice..." she noted as she scanned the room. "I think you look the best, though", she complimented. She scanned his figure, noting the quality of his robes' material, and the way it was cut. His hair was neat, and he looked rather dashing sitting in the dining hall chairs, like something out of a Muggle film.
"I'm glad you invited me, Caelen", she said. "I was beginning to think I wouldn't have a date." She looked down at her hands, fiddling with the rings she wore. "It wouldn't have been much fun tagging along after Lunette and Rue, that's for sure." She grinned up at him and leaned her arms on the cloth-draped table. Her eyes scanned the hall again, noting the excited couples as they roamed the area. Far away, she noticed her friends, Rue's head bent closer to Lune so she could hear him. Her head turned to Caelen again, her mouth stretching into a grin. "I think it's better with a date, anyhow."
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Caelen saw the quick look of confusion that crossed her face in response to his words and he smiled slightly. The expression on her face was attractive and he had to tear his gaze away, he was very certain that he was staring at her and though he couldn't help it he didn't want to make her nervous though he was sure that expression would look nice on her too. She groaned after he spoke again and he wanted to take the words back, he didn't want to upset her as he didn't think he would be able to live with himself if he ever did anything to make her sad and angry and his words seemed to have annoyed her. She spoke and confirmed his worries and he felt foolish for his previous words, he was almost at the point of apologizing when she spoke with a smile that calmed him.
"I don't mind at all" He answered her with a wide smile, the words were pure and sincere as they flowed from his lips. At this moment in time he would do whatever she asked and making a few decisions wasn't a hard task and he quickly agreed. He became very aware from her firm touch on his arm from when he alarmed her with his small sound of pain as they walked to an empty table, joy washed over him as he became happy that she actually cared for him even though they didn't know each other to well. They reached the beautifully decorated table and he gently unlinked their arms to pull out her chair for her. She sat gracefully and his dark eyes followed her movements and pushed the chair in slightly, just as he was taught to do.
He moved to take his own seat besides her and watched her subtle movements as she turned to observed the people in the hall. She made a small comment about her everyone was nicely dress but the words meant nothing to him as the only person that he thought looked nice was her. "No one looks half as gorgeous as you Aife" He spoke looking at her seriously and smiling. He couldn't explain what was happening to him, she was the only thing in his mind and he couldn't tear his gaze from her. Not to mention he was getting a strange feeling that he's never felt before, not in his 17 years as a human or his 10 years as a vampire. He couldn't point out what it was but it made everything else so insignificant, not even the smell of blood was bothering him the only smell he took in was her intoxicating one.
Aife spoke to him again and his heart leaped for joy, if that was possible for a vampire, now he was so happy that he invited her and even more happy she said yes. She looked down and played with her fingers for a moment and Caelen took time to breathe and choose his next words. He was worried about one thing, and that was messing up this night for her, especially when he had such strong feelings for her. She leaned her arms on the table as she grinned at him after her words and Caelen had the sudden urge to touch her hand. Unable to stop himself, he did just that, reaching out and taking one of her hands gently in his, holding on to mostly her fingertips in case she rejected his touch. "I'm glad you said yes" He spoke with a smile as he watched her "I was lucky that you were still available..." he trailed off. What was wrong with him? why did he feel so weird?. He looked at her getting lost in her eyes as he put a name to the feeling.
Love, he was sure of it. But of course he's never been in love so he didn't know what it felt like but he was sure it was something like this. Though he didn't know her well, he's heard it takes months or years to fall in love but he couldn't explain it any other way. Plus muggles had the idea of love at first sight, maybe this was what this was for him, whatever the reason he knew that she was the one for him.
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Aife's heart lunged as Caelen took hold gently of her hands, wrapping her tiny fingers deftly in his. The all too familiar butterflies crowded her stomach, and her cheeks felt hot as they flushed. "Of course I was available, Caelen", she said quietly. His eyes gazed into her own, something that normally would have made her uncomfortable. But she couldn't resist studying them, and, to her surprise she noted that they were considerably lighter than when she'd seen them last. They'd resembled empty, frozen depths before, and they were now much warmer.
Aife gripped his hands with her own. She drew her gaze reluctantly from his, and looked around the room. "I wonder if they're going to serve dinner soon, or if they expect us to dance", she told him. The thought of dancing caused her stomach to turn. It wasn't so much that she was a bad dancer- far from it, actually. It was just that she'd never actually danced with a partner who'd chosen her. She'd taken lessons at home, learning various steps from a tutor, but that wasn't the same thing.
Aife turned back to Caelen, his eyes still studying her, and felt her lips recall their smile. "Do you dance?" she inquired, suddenly aware that most guys balked at the idea. "I wasn't sure if you did. I don't mind it. But if you don't want to, then we don't have to", she said, searching his expression for hints of what he thought. Her eyes strayed to the dance floor where a small scattering of students stood. Some were doing what you would actually call dancing, while others just sort of hopped around.
Aife's stomach rumbled noisily, and she realized she was a tad hungry. She looked around, noting the tables with occupants who'd decided to begin the dinner portion of the night. "We could always eat something first..." she suggested, pointing to the menus that sat beneath the gold plates. "Have you eaten anything today?" she asked him. Realizing too late that she was rambling, she shut her mouth.
The nervous butterflies that filled her empty stomach were starting to get to her. She looked up at Caelen, her eyes returning to his, and giggled. "Sorry", she said, as she realized what she'd just done. She never giggled. Oh dear... she thought. I sound like an airhead... She breathed, the sigh turning slowly into a chuckle. "I sound like a dipstick", she told him.
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Caelen found himself smiling widely as her face turned a pinkish color when he touched her hand. It made him happier than he thought was possible that he could get such a reaction from her and he became even happier when she didn't pull away but answered him. He was actually nervous and ready to pull back at any moment, as a result of him being a vampire his hands were always quite cold and he was afraid she'd take notice or reject it but she didn't and for that he was glad. She stared at him as he stared back and for the first time since he'd been with anyone he didn't feel self conscious over his eyes, he didn't try to turn away but just let her look. Maybe he was hoping that she'd find something out and be ok with it, that was what he wanted when he thought about it that maybe she liked his eyes and he didn't worry about them.
She gripped his hand slightly and broke his gaze and Caelen finally let his eyes fall to something other than her face. Now though his attention was turned to his hand that was holding her's. Studying the color of them, his actually didn't look as pale as he thought and he sighed happily. He gathered the courage to move his hand upwards to hold more than just her fingertips when she started speaking to him, his attention turned towards him with the question. Though it seemed more like she was asking herself so he didn't answer but let her think, though his gaze surveyed the dance floor quickly. "Do you dance?" She asked him and Caelen smiled. Yes he danced, he was actually forced to learn to dance thanks to his family so he would be more happy to dance with her if she wanted to. "I'm not an expert but I dance... I guess" He answered her with humor and his voice and he was ready to stand and lead her to the dance floor when she spoke again.
Caelen felt as if a weight has just been dropped on him when she asked him if he ate. The usual answer would have of course been yes, that's what he told everyone that asked him even though it was lie but he didn't want to lie to her. He didn't feel comfortable doing so, not when he was liking her so much more than he's ever liked anyone. Part of him felt if he answered her with a lie he would be betraying her and he couldn't bring himself to do that so he decided he would tell her the truth. Caelen sighed closing his eyes for only a second before opening them again as he thought of the best way to tell her, to his surprise he wasn't as nervous as he thought he would be. He never told any human of what he was, especially not those he's known for 2 days but there was something about her and he felt more than comfortable with her knowing.
"You don't sound like a... dipstick" He told her smiling widely as he pulled a little closer to her. He thought her giggle was very cute and it brought a smile to his face and made any worries he had vanished. Surely someone so amazing wouldn't judge him on what he was, and that's what made him want to tell her. But there was the chance that she would, and she'd leave and Caelen would have ruined her night like he was afraid of doing but he didn't let those thoughts linger on as he watched her. He took a deep breath and looked around the room quickly for any eavesdroppers before locking his eyes with her's again to speak.
"Actually I don't eat food" Caelen said and turned his eyes towards the table as he mentally slapped himself for the sentence. That is not how he wanted to start but he couldn't think of anything better. "I mean..." He began and took a deep breath looking for the words that would make him stop looking like an idiot. "I don't need to eat food" He said again glancing at her quickly before looking down at the table again. He was nervous now, about choosing the lightest words so that he would not scare her. He would hate it if he made her afraid of him and he knew he wasn't able to take it back. Though he did have the gift of compulsion as a package deal with being a vampire, but he couldn't bring himself to mess with her mind. Not the girl that he was so in love with, he would hate himself forever. He risked a glance at her quickly again and concentrated on not stumbling over his words. "I'm a vampire" He spoke suddenly deciding to just get it over with, the longer he prolonged it the more nervous he would become so why not just tell her.
"But I'm not... dangerous" He said and slapped himself mentally again, he didn't know how to stop the words from flowing out it was as if he couldn't control himself. "I..." Caelen paused finally bringing himself to meet her eyes. "uh..." he spoke with a deep breath and stopped again, first he couldn't stop speaking and now he couldn't speak and he was beginning to feel annoyed. Of course he would worry about anyone's reaction when he told them what he was but waiting for her to react was a million times worse than anything he ever felt in life. "I wouldn't hurt you" He added and sighed deeply not knowing what else he could possibly say.
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Aife smiled as Caelen negated her comment. Yes, she was a dipstick, but she didn't mind that he didn't agree. She just didn't want him to think she was a complete dolt. Because she wasn't, not by a long shot. She watched him as he sat, considering her question. It wasn't really a hard question- wouldn't he remember if he'd eaten dinner that day? Or even lunch? Her head cocked, her features confused, as she realized he was really considering it. She didn't understand- what was there to consider?
Aife almost laughed at his next words, if it wasn't for the confusion occupying her mind. "You don't eat food..." she said slowly, making sure she heard him correctly. His next line made her brows gather, she really didn't understand what he was about. "Caelen. What do you mean, you don't need to eat?" she asked. His gaze shifted quickly to hers, his expression in conflict.
I am a vampire.
Aife froze as the meaning of his words sunk in. She frowned, trying to understand them, to comprehend what he was trying to tell her. Her gaze drifted, she stared off into space, going over his words in her mind. The activity and murmers that surrounded them faded. If he was a vampire... that meant... She thought of the qualities she was familiar with, the gaol that was the life of the eternal beings. What that would mean to someone like Caelen... Vampire... The word resounded in her head. Caelen's voice drifted closer, becoming clearer than the low rumble that was the frantic chatter of the dance hall.
But I'm not... He paused. Dangerous... The word came quickly, pleading. Her gaze returned to his, locking onto the intense orbs that occupied his visage. He stumbled over his words, his voice searching, yearning. I wouldn't hurt you.
Aife stared at him in disbelief as she tried desperately to order her thoughts. He was a vampire... Caelen was a vampire... Her date was a vampire... The words circled slowly thought her head. His sigh came softly, broken. The gaze that held his ambled, landing on the clasp of their bodies. She understood now why his slender hand was so cold. At first, she'd thought it was natural, hers were always freezing. Her fingers moved gently, her wrist withdrawing, running through his fingers. He made a move, like he would take his arm away, but she held fast, settling her hand in his. Her fingers rubbed slowly at his palm, feeling the icy flesh, noticing for the first time how hard it was, how solid. Her mind raced, trying to figure the situation in her head. Surely there were vampires at school, of course. Even werewolves, or different blood lines, other than pure, half, and Muggle. The only difference was that he would live forever. And he could take life. But she was sure that, had he wished to have hers, he could easily have taken it by now.
The thought made her look up, into his eyes. They searched his, for any sign of what he might be thinking. He didn't look dangerous. Although she knew better. But as she sat there, she realized something. He wanted her to trust him. To believe in him. To be able to look past his fate, and she saw that despite his power, and despite his weakness, he was there. Despite the fact that it was probably hard for him to even be next to her. Her lips stretched slowly into a timid smile, and she squeezed his palm.
"I think..." she began, trying words out in her mind. "That it is all right." She looked up at him, unsure of how he might react. "I mean, you aren't the only vampire here, right?" she asked. "I don't know of any others... but still." Her body leaned toward his slightly, then paused. She wasn't sure what made things harder for him, or if it was even hard at all, actually. "What is it like for you to be near to me?" she asked. "To any human, for that matter..."
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Caelen looked at her as she stared back with a strange look on her face. He realized she didn't quite believe what she was hearing, and of course he didn't blame her, and the first thing that crossed her mind he assumed was fear. He expected such a reaction from her despite what he felt for her, shock, disbelief and fear usually followed his confession to the ones he trusted. Which was then followed by hatred, betrayal and on his part regret.
People didn't react as well as the muggles seemed to make it look like. He supposed it was because muggles liked to think of vampires as romantic broken creatures. Well part of it was true, he was broken but there was nothing romantic about being a vampire, well not in his opinion. He was a dangerous creature, a monster that if not kept isolated might lose control and attack anyone in sight. He didn't like the fact that if someone bled in front of him he would lose all control and inhibitions and act purely on instinct. That did not seem romantic to him, not in the least and part of him wished that muggles would show vampires as something to be feared and not longed for.
He wished he could read her thoughts, to get an idea of what exactly was going through her mind as she looked at him. This was the worst thing Caelen has ever experienced in his life, waiting for the girl that he cared so much for, though he hardly knew her, to response to his deepest darkest secret. She looked down suddenly at their clasped hand and moved her hands and Caelen felt the fear he had hit him full blast. She was rejecting him. He took a small breath and straightened his posture to pull his hand away, to make things easier for her, but she didn't let go. Instead she touched his palm gently and Caelen realized she was inspecting him. Searching for more proof that he was a vampire. He looked up to meet her gaze and it was calculating as if she still hasn't make her decision yet.
He thought the worst was over but it wasn't, he was still waiting for her to react and at least when he thought she rejected him he had easily accepted it. Now he was anxious again and he was sure that if his heart was still beating he would have had a heart attack waiting for her to respond by now. Just when Caelen thought he was about to faint in the most unmanly way from anxiety she responded and gave a slight squeeze at his hand. Her words caused him to release one breath he was holding for what seemed like years as he relaxed again. She wasn't afraid of him, or well she could be but she wasn't making it obvious and that warmed his heart, if that was possible for a vampire.
"No I'm not the only one here" He responded her question but said nothing else. He knew other vampires in the castle and as a matter of fact there were some on the dance floor not to far from them, but it wasn't his place to point them out and so he wouldn't. She moved closer to him and Caelen found himself lost in the blue orbs of her eyes again as she spoke. The question though did set him back some, he wasn't really expecting it. But he supposed it could have been worse, she could have asked about his eating habits and that would have killed him.
He looked at her intently as he thought of her question, he decided to answer her honestly, she seemed to handle that very well and so he thought it was the best way to go. "It's a little... frustrating... to be around humans" He spoke and broke her gaze momentarily to look at their hands again before moving back to her face. "It's overwhelming... tempting... alluring" He sighed and continued holding on to her gaze. "But I'm in complete control" He spoke again trying to make her worries go away if she had any. "There are actually more important things to occupy my sense of smell at the current moment, like your lovely perfume" He said with a smile and hit himself mentally. That had to be the most creepy thing he's ever said to a woman and he was sure now she hated him. "I mean... I have no fears with you right now, I think I'm to captivated by your presence to wonder about other things" He flashed her a charming smile as he tried to express himself the best that he could and he thought he did a very good job.
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Aife waited patiently as Caelen gathered his thoughts. It was obviously hard for him to unveil these things to her. She suspected, though, that as she got to know him better, she would probably have figured everything out. It made her feel good that he was entrusting these things in her. No, I'm not the only one here, came the first answer. She nodded, it made sense that there would be more of his kind. The thought made her wonder who else was a vampire, and her gaze followed his to the dance floor. There were a few students who now looked suspicious to her, standing a little farther from other people, their pallid skin glowing in the candlelight. But maybe she was just paranoid. With her own flaxen skin, and how shy she was around people, she probably could have fallen under the category. But that didn't mean she was a vampire, obviously.
Aife returned her gaze to his, their eyes meeting. His own was thoughtful, calculating, like he was weighing the odds on how well she might take things. When he spoke, his words came slowly, his voice hesitant. It came as no surprise to her when he admitted the frustration he felt to be around humans. Though the mention of the temptation their presence produced tugged at her a bit. She wondered how tempted he was now, to change her, or feed on her. She wasn't quite sure how things worked, and wondered how closely she resembled a hearty meal. Looking down at her thin self, she smirked. Probably more like a lean one... she thought. How could she joke about something like that? The thought was absurd, and she chastised herself for thinking so.
But I'm in complete control...
Aife returned her gaze to his, her mind registering his comment. His face was trusting, honest. She realized that she believed him. Probably, he couldn't sit so close, hand clasped with hers, if he weren't in control. He didn't even look hungry. His next words brought a grin to her face.
"You find my smell more important than your nature?" she asked, a small laugh escaping her lips. "I didn't realize it was that good..." Aife turned his hand over in hers, running a nail along his life lines. She looked up at him, wondering if her next question would be okay. "What makes it harder? For you to be around us, I mean", she asked. Her fingers stopped, settling into his palm. "Do you have to keep watch at all times? Aren't you ever afraid you would lose control?" The questions were coming quickly now, and she realized she was curious. "How do you know you're in control? How do they let vampires live among the humans? Is there any accountability?" Aife stopped, and looked at Caelen. "I'm sorry..." she said sheepishly. "I am rambling, yet again. She looked down at their hands and then returned her gaze to her date. Not wanting to make him mad, she excused the questions. "You don't have to answer, of course", she claimed. "I'm just, erm... voicing my curiosity."
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Caelen watched her as her expressions changed barely. She was thinking over his answers he assumed but she didn't make it obvious. In fact she acted as if his words didn't bother her at all, but he knew better. He wasn't stupid after all. He was still waiting for the moment when he's said to much and she ran out and away from him, though he was trying to keep that from happening he knew it was a possibility with the question she was asking. Despite that fear he decided he would give her all honest answers, it would be better to do so now than to lie to her and make things worse the more they got to know each other. He didn't want to risk losing her so soon over something that he could have admitted to when she asked.
Caelen was actually quite proud of himself for doing so well, ever since his attention focused solely on her he became no longer nervous about the overwhelming scent of blood that clouded the air. Too many humans at once usually caused a problem but as he told Aife it seemed her presence drowned out everything else, and he had no problems being here with her. Though he's already decided it was because he held strong feelings for her he still couldn't explain why his vampire nature wasn't being bothered, but he didn't want to waste time searching for an answer as it meant he would have to stop thinking of her.
She answered his slip up about her smell with a laugh and Caelen was unable to stop the grin that formed on his face before he spoke again. This time with no shame or nervousness in his words as he decided that there was nothing else that can make it more awkward. "It's... intoxicating" he answered her with a smile deciding that was the best description he could give her at this time. Her fingernails ran along his hand and Caelen found himself watching the small movements she made as he enjoyed her touch, probably more than he should he thought to himself glumly and sighed. She spoke again and Caelen found his eyes drawn to her face again as he searched for the best answers to give her while she continued to speak.
She stopped suddenly and turned to look at him as she gave an apology that Caelen dismissed just as quickly. He didn't mind the questions, well he did a little, but it meant she was still willing to be friends with him so that made him not care for them to much. He was willing to answer anything she asked he realized, no matter how many bad memories it might bring up for him. "It's alright" He answered her with a wide smile "Nothing wrong with being curious" He added to his statement and looked down at their hand quickly before looking up at her again. "I don't mind them actually" He spoke trying to reassure her as he decided to answer what she's asked before.
He thought about her first question and he realize he couldn't answer it. He wasn't really sure what made it harder to be around them, he suppose that was mostly the vampire's fault than the human's. He took a breath trying to form his words as her other questions ran through his mind, and he was trying to see how to fit it all into one short answer so he didn't give her one long speech. "Not everywhere let vampires live among humans" He decided to start with the last thing she said first as it was the easiest to answer. "People aren't really accepting to that sort of... danger" He said with a sigh at using danger, there he just told her he wasn't dangerous and now he was telling her he was. "But that's why we keep it secret, it might cause madness if the wrong person found out there was a vampire in their classroom... people would freak out and demand that they left..." He spoke glumly as he dropped her gaze while he spoke.
This was one of the few things he had problems speaking about. He wasn't one to voice his insecurities to people but he said he would answer her honestly and so he planned to. "As for what makes it harder, I think it depends more on the person's ability to resist the blood-lust" He spoke taking a breath, this was something that might scare her. He realized that but he was too far in to back out now plus he refused to. "I try to stay away from crowded places as best as I can" He spoke more quietly now as he waited for her to run out any minute now. "Because it's harder to be around a crowd of people than it is to be alone with one person... for me anyway" He added glancing at her so that she understood not all vampires acted the same way. "But it's because when I was turned I isolated myself from all humans for years, so to be around a lot of them at once is..." Caelen paused looking up quickly to catch her gaze as he pulled his hand away from her's gently.
"Well there's always the chance I wouldn't be able to stand it anymore, but I usually feel that moment quickly approaching and I leave if it does so that I don't risk hurting anyone" He spoke and brought his arms in front of him on the table. He wasn't quite sure why he did so, he supposed he felt ashamed to be admitting such things to her and the part of him that felt like a monster didn't want her touching him. It was almost as if he didn't feel worthy. "I think I only gave you more questions... I'm sorry" He said with a sheepish smile as he looked at her quickly. "I... I'd understand if... I mean" He started speaking and found himself stumbling over his words. "If you... want to leave I mean..." He tried again glancing down quickly, he was offering her a chance to get away from him so she didn't feel obligated to stay. "I won't be offended" He added looking at her and hoping she understood what he was trying to tell her.
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The edge of Aife's lips turned up, half smiling in hesitant acknowledgment of Caelen's comment on her questions. She was glad he didn't mind them. It made it easier for her mind to wander over the subjects flitting through her mind, rather than push them back and stunt her curiosity. How many people had he told? How many people at the school knew? Surely it was a requirement to disclose your blood line. She remembered her grandmother completing her school forms, listing the generations of her family as proof of their Veela and Pure blood collaborations. It never occurred to her that there might be others than pure and Muggle, half and Veela.
The face that sat opposite hers was thoughtful, considerate. As if Caelen didn't want to reveal too much at one time, yet searched for the best way to let her know everything. His lips pursed, the pale skin puckering, and he breathed deeply, his mind in conference. Aife nodded as he admitted the repression administered to Vampires, in preference of humans. She understood; after all, how would a human ever be able to kill a Vampire? It would be like leaving a baby with a mentally ill murderer. She blushed at the thought, it wasn't the same. But if they lost control... there would be little difference. Except maybe much less twisted, much less painful.
People aren't really accepting to that sort of danger...
Her thoughts were echoed by his observation. She felt ashamed that she'd thought so, though it was probably beyond true. Her head clouded as he continued to speak, scenes of what the word danger would mean, flashing across her mind, it refused to halt the ministrations of her imagination. She realized he'd probably thought the same at one time or an other; maybe even more often than that. One scene passed, his lips burried in the crook of her neck, his porcelain teeth sinking into her pale skin, the warm rush of blood... She coloured fiercely, the warmth rushing into her cheeks. The thought terrified her, would he ever do such a thing? But somehow, she was able to trust that he could withstand the urge. And that she could help him if possible.
Blood lust...
The term made her eyes flash to his own, her orbs wide. It made sense; that it would be referred to as such. She found herself wondering what blood tasted like to Vampires. Obviously delicious. The memory of her single experience with her grandmother's whiskey came to mind. It was delicious, hot, thick, filling. But then came the burning, the rush of fire that engulfed her throat. She imagined it might be something like that; the intolerable burning, yet the first taste so incredibly delightful, it left you needy... yearning. It was hard to imagine that blood was be so wonderful that there was no payment for it's intake. Her eyes returned to his, returning from it's removed focus, and centering on his own.
Aife let him finish, appalled when he revealed his thoughts, that she might shy from the discussion, that she might leave him alone, disgusted with the person he was. It dawned on her that when he'd withdrawn his hand, it was as if he were releasing her. She shook her head urgently, her forehead wrinkled with concern. "You think I would just leave? Because of this?" she asked, her voice terse. "It isn't as if I would never see you... wewould pass in the halls, at least. I couldn't just ignore you for the rest of school..." she said. Her face smoothed, calming, before she spoke again. "I am not one to abandon friends at the first sign of exigency, Caelen."
Aife sat back, her hands folding over themselves in her lap. Piqued, she looked out on the dance floor. Slowly she calmed, as she realized that he didn't know her well, how would he know that she wouldn't run? That she wouldn't abandon him? Her mind returned to the subject of blood, how it affected him. A thought occured to her, and she looked at him curiously. "Do you lust for blood now?" she asked slowly, searching for words to form a question that would not disturb him. She hesitated, not sure if she even wanted to know the answer to the question waiting eagerly on the tip of her tongue. "Do you lust for mine?" She searched his eyes, hoping for a glimpse of what he was thinking. Oh, what she would give at times to be able to read minds.
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As Caelen sat waiting her reaction he could feel his unbeating heart ready to leap out of his chest. Anticipation was torture and his mind was buzzing with the million different ways he thought she was going to reject him. He told her he wouldn't be offended and that was true, why would he be?. No, Caelen knew by now how others reacted to learning their friend was a blood thirsty monster, he knew that as cool and collected as she seemed her heart was racing. He could hear it, literally hear it that is, enhanced hearing made it so nothing was left out. He could hear everything that was going around him and usually Caelen was able to tune out his surroundings but with his nervousness he was finding it hard to control anything. That included the paranoia he felt every second of everyday except now it was ten times worse as he waited for the girl he had such strong feelings for take her chance at an escape.
He now wished he never offered her a chance to leave, why was he so foolish to actually give her an opportunity to escape. That thought sounded terrifying even to him as the only thing that quickly crossed his mind was if he didn't want Aife to escape than she wouldn't be able to, she wouldn't even stand a chance at trying. That's why he did it, the horrific thought opened his eyes again as he realized why he was telling her she was free to leave, free to ignore his existence, free to pretend this night never happened. It was because of thoughts such as those, thoughts that her life was in danger by being only in his presence and that's what calmed him again.
Though he didn't want her to leave, he actually didn't think he would be able to survive if she walked away from him. He realized how overdramatic such a statement was as he barely knew anything about the girl but he couldn't help how he felt about her and he couldn't live with pushing her away. Which was a shock to him, within his ten years of being a vampire Caelen perfected the cold mask that sent chills down people's spine and drove them away. He excelled in the art of wall building as he made sure no one ever got close to him and when he felt like they were near to breaking his wall he pushed them away. But he couldn't picture doing the same with Aife, he couldn't imagine himself driving her away. It would pain him beyond words can explain and that was one of the reasons he felt as if he was going to jump up and take back his offer, or beg her to reconsider, whichever worked best. He knew it was a selfish thought but he never said he wasn't selfish, he was in Sournois after all and they weren't known for being the most selfless of the bunch.
She answered him than, after what to Caelen seemed like umpteenth hours, she replied in a way that made him feel both idiotic and relieved. He watched her face as she spoke, obviously angered by his proposal, that was not a reaction he was expecting. Not once did the thought that he in a way insulted her occur to him, he wasn't meaning to, he was just trying to help her. Well that's what he told himself, really he knew it was just his own paranoia that led him to believe Aife would leave him like the other people he cared about did. She couldn't blame him though could she? well yes she could, he assumed something terrible about her, he felt horrible and there was no excuse for it. Her words lifted him, and he found himself believing them. Another shock, Caelen was possibly the most skeptical person in France and here he took in all of Aife's words and held on to them. Tightly at that, maybe he just wanted to believe them, as to him it means she cared for him at least a fraction of what he did for her.
She spoke his name and Caelen released a breath as his hand reached out as if to touch her but he pulled back just as quickly. He still wasn't able to let her touch the monster, he didn't feel deserving of such a thing. "I didn't mean to offend you..." He started, speaking quietly as his eyes locked on hers "I shouldn't have said that... I'm sorry" He sighed deciding that was all he could say to her. He couldn't go into details telling her why he assumed it in the first place, he wasn't sure he really wanted her to know how broken he really was, not yet anyway, maybe when they got to know each other more she'd realize it on her own.
Aife broke his gaze and looked around the dance floor as she started to calm and Caelen found his eyes wandering also. He felt ashamed for what he said to her and he really wanted to make it up to her, no matter what it takes. She turned to look at him and spoke with a question that completely knocked him out of his reverie. What a question, he saw this coming of course but the little part of him that liked to be hopeful hoped she wouldn't ask it but than again hoping was for people that weren't damned, or that's what he decided on a long time ago. He inhaled a lung full of air as she spoke again and Caelen literally felt every muscle in his body tense up. How was he suppose to answer that, he wouldn't lie, he said he wouldn't but why would she ask that when the truth would scare her.
"I..." Caelen started with a deep sigh as he looked at her "It's faint" He decided on saying as he watched her. It was faint, the lust that he felt, very faint actually but with her mention of it the feeling seemed to grow and Caelen felt himself began to worry. The whole night was going along great so far without any need or want to feed but of course Caelen still had the small feeling at the back of his mind. Now though, things were getting very bad very quickly. As his mind was on the matter of her blood it seemed it was the only thing he was able to focus on now. The sound of her beating heart that grew faster each second at his answer, the rushing sound of the blood flowing through her seemed to grow steadily louder and Caelen was almost sure he could now see the artery beneath her skin.
He looked down quickly at the thought as he found it extremely hard to concentrate on anything but the smell of her, it was enticing. More so than he actually thought it could be and Caelen was becoming very afraid for her. Without another thought he stood up abruptly and released a deep sigh as he looked at her. "uh... I'm sorry" He spoke quickly and quietly, not even able to hear his own words over the thumping noise in his ear. "I just... need to... go" He spoke again almost in a mumble "Sorry" He repeated quietly and gave her a sincere and apologetic look before walking away from the table. He thought for a moment how insane people would deem him if he covered his ears and ran out but he didn't want to embarrass his date, or ex-date now that he was more or less ditching her, and took a look around quickly as he exited the ball room.
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Aife stared at Caelen, desperate to glean some form of understanding from his features. He looked disappointed... hard... conflicted. His body was still as a statue, his every muscle visibly tightened in response to her inquiry. Her eyes closed, she took a deep breath, and opened them again. Be still... she thought. On his own time... She sat patiently waiting for him to speak.
I... It's faint...
Aife expected more- an explanation, an extension of his words, anything. Anything besides this horrible, uncomfortable silence. Her eyes watched over him, taking in every ounce of tension, the icy form of his features, the way his fists curled in his lap. Caelen was motionless. Completely so, that she wondered if he'd frozen in the room heated with so many bodies. She leaned closer, just a tad, trying to sense the change in him, what had caused such immense stillness.
Aife jumped, her heart thudding, when his head dropped quickly, his gaze directed toward his lap. She felt the need to reach out, to offer help. Her hand began it's journey before she withdrew it. "Caelen?" she asked, her voice sounded small and insignificant. "Are you okay?"
Aife was just about to scoot closer, when Caelen jumped up. She sat back quickly. Her eyes followed, gazing at him confusedly. His stutters surprised her, she was sure she'd never heard anyone stumble so carelessly over their words so much as she had from her friend tonight. "Caelen, really..." she said, trying to reason with him. His apolagies came quickly, his excuse was lame. She sat confounded, as he left her alone in the room full of amorous couples.
It took her a minute to realize where she was in her evening. She looked around, dazed, at the crowd moving around her. Caelen was gone... and there she was, sitting like an absolute dolt. It was obvious she'd been left, a few party-goes sat staring at her, their faces pitying. Aife took a deep breath, attempting to gather what little dignity she could muster. Her chair scraped loudly against the hard stone floor; she didn't bother to push it back in as she stood. Instead, she made a bee line through the surge, to the wide open doors.
The hall was empty, everyone had filtered in and was enjoying the party. Aife stood, looking around at the array of corridors that Caelen could have chosen. Sournois... The name came to her like a brazen flame. She remembered vaguely the map of the school she'd recieved when she'd been accepted. The Sournois dorms had been placed somewhere nearby...
A pair of students, both tall and glamourously robed, swished past her, heading for a set of stairs nearly invisble to the naked eye. She followed, assuming by their countenance that they belonged to the more selfish house. Sounds about right, anyway Aife thought, as she followed them down the stairs. The hall twisted and turned, becoming colder and damper as she went. The pair were soon out of sight, the turns coming closer together, before she finally came to a massive, horrific Raven. She looked at it hesitantly- there was nowhere else to go, the hall ended quite soon. The Raven arched oevr her, it's tall wings extending from it's body. "Erm... Sournois?" she squeaked, instantly feeling rediculous.
Aife turned, and trudged down the stone hallway, passing a threesome of boys joking loudly on their way to the dorms. She wrapped her arms around her, now would have been a perfect time to have a shawl... As she ascended the steps, she could hear the jolly chatter filtering through the entrance hall from the dance. Tonight could have been so perfect... why did she have to ruin it by asking such a stupid question. She chided herself, thinking of things she could have asked instead, things that would have been easier for him to answer. His face came to her mind, so cold and hard, his jaw set determinedly. She wondered why he'd had to leave the table. He'd been doing so well, too. It's faint... he'd said quietly. It couldn't have been her blood, or anyone else's. Unless he was lying. Aife dismissed the thought at once, why would he have lied to her?
A sudden thought came to her. Maybe he hadn't been lying. But before, when they'd discussed blood, they weren't exactly talking about it in the same way. Her mind returned to the moment his posture changed, his form becoming rigid. Was it harder when he actually talked about it? Or maybe he'd just thought about it more, paid more attention to it. She wondered if he'd paid any of that attention to her own blood. A shiver rode her spine as she tried to imagine what could have been going through his mind. Had he been close to... doing it? She trembled, for the first time that night, truly afraid of what could have been. It was fine for him to be a vampire, she was sure she could handle that. But what if he lost control? What if he someday turned on her? Would it be quick? Could he suffice with just drinking from her, or would he have to continue, till she was void of all blood? Or what if it wasn't quick? What if it was slow- what if it was painful? A thought occured to her. What if it was more hurried, if he tore into her rather than taking his time? Ravishing her until her body was torn to bits, her bones broken, blood splattered everywhere.
A boy bumped into Aife, a girl skirted her side. She realized she'd been standing in the middle of the hall, outside the Rouerie common room. She entered quietly, her thoughts weighing heavily in her mind. The room, then the stairwell, passed Aife by, as she strode sullenly to her room. She opened the door, and shut it carefully behind her. All lights were off- she'd forgotten that it was light when she'd been getting ready. Her body leaned against it, weak. For the first time in her life, she didn't know what to do. She couldn't call on her normally reasonable mind- it was screaming, no pleading, for her to abandon her friend. And she knew what her Grandmother would say if she sent Basil her way. Pack your bags- you're coming home or something along those lines. Her head sunk into her hands, and angry tears welled in her lids. What should she do?
Dorian curled around one leg, his purrs vibrating through the thin material of Aife's gown. She stood, clutching her bed post to pull herself up, and made her way to her closet. It still stood open, and she slipped off the creme gown, settling it carefully into it's protective bag. An old tee shirt peeked out of one drawer, and she grabbed it, slipping it over her head. She struggled with the neck- she'd forgotten her head full of curls. Finally finished, she climbed into bed, sliding under the icy sheets. Her legs moved back and forth, trying to heat the cold material. Dorian jumped onto the bed, coming to curl around Aife's pillow.
Her thoughts returned instantly to Caelen, and his flight from the dance hall. He'd been gone in less than a second. Aife was sure she'd never found out so many important things about a single person in one night before. Sure, it all fell under one category, but oh the information he'd shared! It felt good that he'd trusted her with that, at least. As for the reason he'd left her alone- she wasn't sure what to think. But in the quiet darkness, as she lay recalling the memory of his form, his demeanor and it's changes throughout the night, the warmth in his eyes as his hand reached out for hers, she realized something. It was his choice, whether he could be around her or no. He alone knew his limits, what he could take, and what he couldn't. If was tempted at all, she was sure he'd do what he could to prevent the worst. She just wasn't sure she knew what the worst was. The scene displayed in her mind as she'd stopped before the Rouerie entrance came to mind again. Aife shuddered, burrowing deeper into her pillows. Dorian mewed inquiringly, his head peeping up. "It's okay, boy... just thinking", she excused. She sighed, her body was exhausted from the night- who knew how tiring such thought provoking matters could be? She lay still, hugging her pillow, the questions, events, and mysteries of the night flitting through her mind, as she waited for sleep to take her.
Showing posts with label february 08. Show all posts
Showing posts with label february 08. Show all posts
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Wanting What You Can't Have
13 February, 2008 (8:45am) - 5 March, 2008 (4:33am)
Link.
With a very loud and annoyed sigh Caelen showed his opinion by getting up and moving away from the boys, they questioned him as they were obviously not happy with being ignored but he simply kept walking. Sometimes he saw being cold and mean as the only answer to resolve such things, if he wasn't than he would sit there still in order to get the boys to befriend him and Caelen was not the type of person to change himself just to have friends. In fact he was in a way the opposite, he did change over the years, mentally not physically since that was impossible for vampires, but it had a negative effect on his life, well one that he wanted but still negative. He found it easier now to drive someone away and live with it afterwards, he suppose it was years of being cold to his friends so they'd leave him alone for their own safety. While they listened and gave the boy the space he asked for, and ended their friendship, he just kept losing bits of his humanity and now he stood as a ticking cold time bomb. One that was able to be cold and mean to someone he wanted for whatever reason and instead of mopping over it and being sorry like his old self he got over it quite quickly.
Though he didn't put much use into his new found talent, if you would call such thing a talent, well not yet in Beauxbatons at least he was doing good so far, avoiding as much human friends as possible and he was fine with that. He really lacked some self control when it came to things like feeding and with human friends he would worry constantly. Worry that they would either find out what he is and be disgusted and leave him alone, like his family did, and worried that one day he would slip and hurt one of them and that was the last thing he wanted. He was sure if he ever bit any of his friends on a slip up that he'd actually lose the little part of a soul that he had left. Sometimes he wondered if he even had a soul, this curse placed upon him damned him for life and he was sure he no longer possessed a soul and he was slowly but surely losing his humanity. Soon he was sure that there would be nothing left but the ghost of what once use to be a boy in the body of a new found monster, not monster in the literal sense of course, he would never start to kill or anything, but he did believe that he would become cold and broken beyond repair so he just sat dreading the day until it happened.
Lost in his very hopeless thoughts Caelen had no idea where his feet were leading him, he has yet to see every inch of the school and he certainly did not recognize this hallway. The halls were quiet and empty and Caelen took a quick look around and surely enough he was the only one occupying it, it made him wonder what time it was for he had no clue. He lost track of days and nights on weekends, almost very literally, as he spend most of the time in the clock-tower watching the students walk by. It's very funny when you think about it, how does someone in a clock-tower lose track of time? but his mind was always elsewhere and days or nights and hours seemed the same to him. He continued forward as he saw no reason to turn around now, he was already in a corridor that was unknown to him so what harm could there be in exploring. He was more than capable of taking care of himself as being a vampire provided him with indescribable strength and speed, and years upon years of schooling made him excel in spells and hexes so he saw no harm in walking forward.
He finally came to the end of the long silent hallway and he stood in front of a door. Caelen rose an eyebrow slightly as a look of confusion crossed his face, he was a little annoyed to say the truth that all there was, was a plain door at the end of a hallway. It did spark his curiosity more of course as he wanted to see what was so great that it had to be so far down a very creepy hallway. His hand flew to the doorknob without a moment of hesitation and to his surprise the door was unlocked, he thought the effect of this door along with this hallway was a little melodramatic even for the people at Beauxbatons but he continued anyway. Caelen walked into the room and closed the door behind him without looking back, he had no need to since if anyone was following him he'd surely know with his enhanced senses, the room was empty and dark and through the windows that were in the far back of the room he saw it was nighttime. He walked forward slowly as if expecting someone or something to jump out of the shadows and attack him, but nothing, and he found it hard to believe that this room simply held a mirror. That was the only thing he saw, an antique looking mirror in the middle of the room with writing into the carving that he could make out to be 'The Mirror of...'. The rest of the words were lost to him due to his lack of knowledge of the Latin language.
Caelen sighed walking forward as he was so eager to see what made this mirror so special. He stood in front of the thing for a moment staring at his reflection, that was all he saw, his reflection and he wasn't quite sure what to expect. A part of him was expecting maybe a boggart, or he was expecting his reflection to do something, like attack him, he didn't really see what he was waiting for and he sighed ready to leave the room when he noticed it; The person he was looking at wasn't him, his reflection was very different from him. He realized as to why he didn't notice earlier, the difference was too minimal but it meant the world to him. The person staring back at him still had those gray eyes, the ones that he lost when he made the mistake of running into a vampire, the ones that he would never see again, and would never be his again. The ones that were replaced by the nearly black cold dead eyes that he was forced to wear everyday.
Caelen scoffed slightly as he continued looking at himself, or his old self. He realized the person staring back at him was human since he lost his gray eyes when he ceased to be human and the more he looked at his reflection the more he hated having this curse on him. He actually reached his limit with the mirror, he wanted to break it, shatter it into a million pieces for mocking him, showing him what he use to be, what he wanted to be but would never have a chance to be. "The Mirror of..." He spoke coldly as he felt all the warmth leave his body, in the metaphorical sense of course, and continued looking at the mirror. He understood what it did now, it showed you your desire and now he wished he never came into the room.
He couldn't believe that something so horrible existed, such a thing to tempt you and mock you until you're driven insane, he finally understood what the mirror was truly there for and he took a chance at guessing the name. "The Mirror of... Suicide" He spoke out-loud with a hint of humor in his voice, that was the only possible answer he could think of for this mirror, it was meant to drive you to suicide. He continued staring at the person in front of him, the person that stood mocking him, as he tried to gather the courage to leave the room.
Deft, spiny fingers rolled the pages ears as their owner scowled in concentration. Not that she'd needed it. This was her fourth run through the book, and she'd memorized almost every significant plot line. Aife turned the leaf, and crossed her hand to the wall, letting her pale digits guide her as she walked blindly through the corridors. She walked swiftly, her eyes scanning the detailed lines in time with the swings of her long, pale legs.
So deep in concentration was she, that Aife barely had time to notice the open door before her, and ran right into the stile of the hard oak plank. She dropped her book, her startled hands launching out to regain her standings. Confused, she looked around as she bent to retrieve the text. The door was far down a lone passageway, she noticed the light was sparse here, and the dusty stone walls seemed highly familiar. She glanced beyond the frame as she rose, and noted the vast room, empty of anything except high, arched windows and a massive mirror.
Aife blanched at the sight, the memory of her first encounter with the glass filling her tangled mind. She turned slowly, quite ready to return to the puzzle of hallways when a thought made her pause. It wasn't as if she had to look at the mirror. And she knew her grandmother was all right, she'd received an owl from her just that morning. Her feet shifted in the direction of the room, and she hesitantly stepped over the threshold.
Before she ventured farther into the room, she realized it was all ready occupied. Aife paused, unsure as to whether she should stay or leave. She glanced at the boy, taking in his impressive height and clean appearance. Usually she was incredibly shy at introducing herself amongst new people. However, it really did help when they were all alone, with only the two of them to notice her short comings. She thought of Lunette, who was so much better than she was at socializing.
Taking a cue from her friend, she thought of a phrase that might make her sound witty, and more sure of herself than she felt. She folded her arms and leaned against the frame of the door. "If you plan on killing yourself any time soon, you might want to gaze in there a little bit longer..." she quipped, pulling absentmindedly on a fiery strand of hair.
As he grew up the only words that ever came out of his mother's and fathers mouths were blood related. Marry a pure-blood witch, continue the legacy, have loads of children. They seemed the type to be supporters of Voldemort when he was around but Caelen never asked as that was none of his business. His family's bad reputation with the non-pure blooded almost caused him to be friendless and though he tried to not care about his friends blood status he knew if his parents found out he was friends with muggle borns they would be angry. When he was turned for some reason he thought he could go to his family for help, and of course that was not a good idea. They resented him for what he was, blamed him for ruining his life and the wife of the family who's daughter he was suppose to marry. He was the only son of the family and they blamed for ruining his chances of ever producing an heir. He tried to remember what he was thinking when he decided to go back to them after he became a vampire, he should have known they would have shunned him but part of him believed they loved him to much to do so. Now his eyes were opened, he realized that he couldn't really trust anyone, no matter how much they claimed to love you he would always be something to be feared and hated.
Caelen took a deep breath as he stared into the reflection of what he use to be, he tried to picture if he could have gone back to the day he ran into Bernard would he have done anything different. The answer he came up with ultimately was no, he was never able to turn his back on someone that needed help and even though his good deed on that night turned him into a vampire he was sure he would just do it again. He didn't hate the man for turning him, it wasn't his fault he knew that if he didn't turn him that he would be dead right now. Though he knew that his sire wouldn't be able to live with himself if he had let him die instead, he still wished the guy had chosen that option because now he was stuck as a soulless being and he didn't think he'd ever be able to be happy with that.
Lost in his thoughts he didn't take notice of the person that entered the room until he heard her speak. Caelen turned around quickly to see who spoke to him since it wasn't a voice he recognized. The same instant he cursed himself for letting his mind become to preoccupied to smell or hear her until it was too late. Not that he could have done anything, there was no where to hide in the room and he actually wasn't in the mood to run away right this moment. He slipped his hands into his pockets as he looked at her, she was a little hard to see in the darkness but he made no move to approach her, instead he chose to answer her with his currents thoughts.
"If only it was so easy" He spoke quietly not sure whether or not she heard him. He wasn't suicidal, Bernard had told him from his first week as new fledging that there was very little that can kill him. It wasn't even yet proven if the killing curse could kill a vampire so he never bothered trying to end his immortal life. He took a breath to clear his mind as he tried to return to his smiling nature. Though it was forced he made it a goal to never let anyone catch him while he was down, this girl unfortunately did so he decided to change the subject. "How long have you been stalking me?" He asked looking at her with a small smirk and finally stepped away from the mirror to walk forward.
"Not but a minute, really", Aife told him. Her gaze ventured over his pallid features as she spoke, taking in his slender build and crisp visage. "I was..." she glanced down to the book in her hands. "Reading... and wandering." Her gaze returned to him, and she realized something was different about him. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, and she searched his features as she thought about the prospect. Her eyes landed on his, and with alarm, she noticed the contrast in his eyes.
They reminded her of a time when she'd been hiking in caves. One chamber was long and the ceiling high, and two people could stand side by side without touching. The guides had cautioned their wards and then turned off the lights. As the lights faded, the surrounding area became pitch black, devoid of any possible light. It was so... empty. As if she were entirely alone, despite the fact that her sister stood right next to her.
Aife's eyes widened, as she realized she'd been staring at the young man as she recalled the moment from her past. Her blue orbs fastened to his own, not withdrawing their gaze as she continued. "I'm sorry if I surprised you. It's just that I'm familiar with the mirror..." Her head nodded toward the glass that leaned against the wall. "It isn't anything good, I can tell you that now. It does things to you..."
Aife pulled her gaze reluctantly from his, and looked toward the mirror. It stood so deviously innocent against the cold stones, she wasn't surprised how easily one could be drawn to it. Recalling her manners, Aife extended her palm to greet his. "My name is Aife, by the way. Aife Argent." A smiled played across her lips as she waited for him to respond, her pupils again inspecting his obsidian irises. "You aren't a Rouerie, are you?" she asked.
A strange expression crossed her face quickly as if she was searching for her next words and Caelen simply stood still waiting for an answer. He was joking of course, trying to lighten the mood and he hoped that his statement hadn't offended her. She shook her head and shrugged her shoulders as if giving up and Caelen rose an eyebrow as to why when she responded. He wasn't surprise that she wasn't standing there long since he would have noticed her of course, but then again his thoughts were so engrossed into his memories that he didn't realize he was there until she spoke and he still cursed himself for that. What good was his enhanced senses if he didn't even use them right.
Caelen let his gaze wander to the book in her hand when hers did before looking up to meet her gaze. Reading and wandering was what lead her to be in the same room with him. That almost seemed like fate playing with him, but than again Caelen didn't believe in such things as fate. Though he did believe in luck... and he decided it was bad luck that lead him to be a vampire and though the girl was very pretty he thought it was also bad luck that caused her to catch him mopping in front of a mirror. As his thoughts wandered Caelen realized that the girl had stop speaking and was most likely awaiting a reply, he turned to answer her when he caught the look on her face. She was staring it was blatantly obvious and Caelen felt a surge of insecurity run through him. There was no mistake she looking at his eyes, they always did and he was afraid to look away as to not seem rude but the more she held his gaze the more he wanted to shield them. It seemed the mirror made his insecurity worse now as it was accompanied by a nice case of paranoia.
She spoke again and Caelen found himself concentrating on not leaving the room, finally she broke his gaze and he released a small breath. She began to talk about the mirror and nodded towards it and Caelen turned to look at the evil thing again. "I've realized that" He said with some humor in his voice when she spoke about the power that the mirror held. He released a breath and turned to look at her as curiosity got the best of him. He knew his question would bring nothing good from her words but he couldn't stop himself from asking. "What do you see when you look into it?" He spoke with a look of seriousness on his face. He really wanted to know, He suppose if it was to see if everyone felt anger towards the mirror like he did or not.
She extended her hand towards him and spoke her name and Caelen gave her a charming smile. Her name was unique, he had to admit but he supposed it fit her in a way. He extended his own to take hers by the tips gently and lifted her hand to his lips to lay a delicate kiss before returning it to her side. "I'm Caelen Sage" He added with a smile and brought his arm to his side also. He didn't really like saying his last name anymore but the name felt empty without it so he used it. "No, not Rouerie" He answered her with the same dazzling smile but then his brows narrowed questioningly. "Though I take offense to that statement, I think I'd make a fine Rouerie" He answered placing a hand on his heart. "But I suppose they didn't want me..." He spoke again with an over dramatic sigh as he glanced at her from the corner of his eyes.
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Aife blushed at Caelen's formal introduction. His name was beautiful, and she had to say, it fit him well. She grinned when he confirmed Rouerie's lacking, and her lips twitched at his further musings. Fighting back a laugh, her hand rose to hide the evidence. "I'm sure the sorting cloak had no idea what it was missing", she said, smiling widely.
Aife thought back to his earlier question. "Actually... I saw my father. And then my grandmother", she began. "It made me think that she was dead... I mean, my father passed when I was young, so I just assumed..." her voice trailed, she thought of that horrible morning in the room, and the mirror's taunting ways. "It drove me crazy. Almost literally..." she conceded. "But she is all right. Really. I think it just shows you what you want the most... or it's supposed to", she claimed. "But I think it is capable of much more..." She stood still, thinking. "It isn't good to get too wrapped up in it."
Aife looked up at Caelen. "What did you see?" she asked. His expression faltered, and she held her hands up. "Don't worry... you don't have to tell me", she said quickly. "I don't mind it." She smiled softly. If he wanted to talk, he could- she was a great listener. But she never pushed people farther than they needed to go. "By the way, what are you doing up here?" she asked. "How did you find this room?"
She began talking of the mirror and Caelen found himself feeling pity for her. He imagined when she saw her father she felt a sense of longing and since she saw her grandmother also he assumed maybe she was homesick. Either way thinking of the mirror made him angry again, he wondered if he was the only one to have such a reaction to the mirror. Maybe it was because his personality was so complicated, he didn't feel longing over not being human he was just angry that he wasn't and that was the reaction the mirror brought from him. He couldn't imagine himself being driven insane by the mirror since truthfully if Aife hadn't walked in when she did there was a chance he would have broken it regardless of the consequences.
Aife asked him the same question in return and he cursed himself silently. Of course he should have expected such a question but he didn't and he assumed she noticed the change in his thoughts as she dismissed it just as quickly. He sighed softly deciding he owed her an apology, she did reveal to him what she saw so he should do the same to her but he couldn't, not without revealing what he was. Maybe he could lie to her... no that wouldn't be a good idea, he didn't want to start off lying outright to someone he barely knew. "Sorry... it's just very... personal" He spoke with an apologetic look hoping that was enough to sattisfy her for the time being.
Another smile crossed his face at her other question as he tried to think of the best way to make his short and boring tale of finding this room an interesting one. He sighed softly and looked at her with a grin as he spoke. "I was driven out of my common room by an arguing pair..." He began as he tried to remember what the two were talking about before he left. "It was a very interesting tale of quidditch... and I ran far far away and ended up here" He said with a laugh as he watched her. "Curiosity got the best of me, a door at the end of a hallway is always hiding a secret so I came in and found this amazing little mirror of suicide" Caelen grinned using his personal name for the mirror as he glanced at it quickly.
He wondered how something that seemed so insignificant could completely destroy someone's state of ease. He really wished he never came in here but now he wasn't regretting it as much as he just made a new very attractive redhead friend. "I'm in Sournois by the way" He added after a moment as he realized she still wasn't aware of what house he was in. "Does that lessen your opinion of me?" He asked mocking a hurt expression. Sournois weren't known for their niceties and he was sure the other houses resented that particular house.
At the mention of the mirror, Aife's gaze turned toward the glass. "It really could be suicidal..." she noted. She looked back up at Caelen. "So are you glad that curiosity bested you?" she asked, her head cocking inquiringly. It was debatable that anyone could be glad to find the mirror, though she had heard of people who'd enjoyed their views. She moved further into the room, looking at the mirror, though avoiding direct contact. It was ironic... how harmless it seemed, even now. She turned, facing Caelen again.
"Oh, you are Sournois, then?" she asked. A smile crossed her features when he asked how her opinion faired. "No, it does nothing to my opinion..." she mused. "I tend to not judge people on their house placement." Aife thought a moment, considering her accumalation of friends at the school. "I do not know a lot of Sournois students, though when I ask after one, people aren't exactly thrilled..." She focussed on Caelen. "Do you think you belong in Sournois?" she asked. "Considering what it is said to stand for? Or do you believe that the house doesn't define the student?"
Aife thought about her own placement. "I guess I would belong to Rouerie regardless", she said, shrugging her shoulders thoughtfully. "I am most certain that Cossu doesn't fit me, and Sournois is probably even more ill fitting. If you think about what they stand for, that is..." she noted.
Aife returned her gaze to Caelen's. "What brings you to Beauxbatons?" she asked. "Besides the obvious, of course... Do you like it here?" She felt curious, and the lack of witnesses emboldened her usually shy manners. "Where are you from, anyway?" she asked, her small white teeth showing through her smiling lips.
Aife stood still, listening as Caelen answered her various questions. She realized she was rambling again, or maybe taking to many liberties. But he could always refuse to answer. She'd have no problem with such. It occurred to her that she wanted to hear him speak. His voice was smooth, and his expressions changed beautifully. His words held her attention, just as the mirror stood ignored behind her.
Link.
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Caelen nodded his head to what might have been the hundredth time that night to the guys that were currently talking to him. He was being forced to play peacemaker by some random boys in his dorm that he didn't even know and he couldn't escape. He had no clue what the boys were talking about, he's never heard a word they said to him he just nodded at every pause to make it seem like he was paying attention. He's never been one to involve himself in other's conflicts and he wasn't going to begin now, he wanted to make a few friends not gain enemies over some silly matter that could easily be avoided. He tried to remember how exactly he managed to get sucked into this very pointless discussion about Quidditch, yes that's what they were talking about he realized that now. "You're kidding" He spoke to himself, although loudly and the boys ignored it, Quidditch was a great sport he agreed but that was no reason to fight with someone for almost twenty minutes.With a very loud and annoyed sigh Caelen showed his opinion by getting up and moving away from the boys, they questioned him as they were obviously not happy with being ignored but he simply kept walking. Sometimes he saw being cold and mean as the only answer to resolve such things, if he wasn't than he would sit there still in order to get the boys to befriend him and Caelen was not the type of person to change himself just to have friends. In fact he was in a way the opposite, he did change over the years, mentally not physically since that was impossible for vampires, but it had a negative effect on his life, well one that he wanted but still negative. He found it easier now to drive someone away and live with it afterwards, he suppose it was years of being cold to his friends so they'd leave him alone for their own safety. While they listened and gave the boy the space he asked for, and ended their friendship, he just kept losing bits of his humanity and now he stood as a ticking cold time bomb. One that was able to be cold and mean to someone he wanted for whatever reason and instead of mopping over it and being sorry like his old self he got over it quite quickly.
Though he didn't put much use into his new found talent, if you would call such thing a talent, well not yet in Beauxbatons at least he was doing good so far, avoiding as much human friends as possible and he was fine with that. He really lacked some self control when it came to things like feeding and with human friends he would worry constantly. Worry that they would either find out what he is and be disgusted and leave him alone, like his family did, and worried that one day he would slip and hurt one of them and that was the last thing he wanted. He was sure if he ever bit any of his friends on a slip up that he'd actually lose the little part of a soul that he had left. Sometimes he wondered if he even had a soul, this curse placed upon him damned him for life and he was sure he no longer possessed a soul and he was slowly but surely losing his humanity. Soon he was sure that there would be nothing left but the ghost of what once use to be a boy in the body of a new found monster, not monster in the literal sense of course, he would never start to kill or anything, but he did believe that he would become cold and broken beyond repair so he just sat dreading the day until it happened.
Lost in his very hopeless thoughts Caelen had no idea where his feet were leading him, he has yet to see every inch of the school and he certainly did not recognize this hallway. The halls were quiet and empty and Caelen took a quick look around and surely enough he was the only one occupying it, it made him wonder what time it was for he had no clue. He lost track of days and nights on weekends, almost very literally, as he spend most of the time in the clock-tower watching the students walk by. It's very funny when you think about it, how does someone in a clock-tower lose track of time? but his mind was always elsewhere and days or nights and hours seemed the same to him. He continued forward as he saw no reason to turn around now, he was already in a corridor that was unknown to him so what harm could there be in exploring. He was more than capable of taking care of himself as being a vampire provided him with indescribable strength and speed, and years upon years of schooling made him excel in spells and hexes so he saw no harm in walking forward.
He finally came to the end of the long silent hallway and he stood in front of a door. Caelen rose an eyebrow slightly as a look of confusion crossed his face, he was a little annoyed to say the truth that all there was, was a plain door at the end of a hallway. It did spark his curiosity more of course as he wanted to see what was so great that it had to be so far down a very creepy hallway. His hand flew to the doorknob without a moment of hesitation and to his surprise the door was unlocked, he thought the effect of this door along with this hallway was a little melodramatic even for the people at Beauxbatons but he continued anyway. Caelen walked into the room and closed the door behind him without looking back, he had no need to since if anyone was following him he'd surely know with his enhanced senses, the room was empty and dark and through the windows that were in the far back of the room he saw it was nighttime. He walked forward slowly as if expecting someone or something to jump out of the shadows and attack him, but nothing, and he found it hard to believe that this room simply held a mirror. That was the only thing he saw, an antique looking mirror in the middle of the room with writing into the carving that he could make out to be 'The Mirror of...'. The rest of the words were lost to him due to his lack of knowledge of the Latin language.
Caelen sighed walking forward as he was so eager to see what made this mirror so special. He stood in front of the thing for a moment staring at his reflection, that was all he saw, his reflection and he wasn't quite sure what to expect. A part of him was expecting maybe a boggart, or he was expecting his reflection to do something, like attack him, he didn't really see what he was waiting for and he sighed ready to leave the room when he noticed it; The person he was looking at wasn't him, his reflection was very different from him. He realized as to why he didn't notice earlier, the difference was too minimal but it meant the world to him. The person staring back at him still had those gray eyes, the ones that he lost when he made the mistake of running into a vampire, the ones that he would never see again, and would never be his again. The ones that were replaced by the nearly black cold dead eyes that he was forced to wear everyday.
Caelen scoffed slightly as he continued looking at himself, or his old self. He realized the person staring back at him was human since he lost his gray eyes when he ceased to be human and the more he looked at his reflection the more he hated having this curse on him. He actually reached his limit with the mirror, he wanted to break it, shatter it into a million pieces for mocking him, showing him what he use to be, what he wanted to be but would never have a chance to be. "The Mirror of..." He spoke coldly as he felt all the warmth leave his body, in the metaphorical sense of course, and continued looking at the mirror. He understood what it did now, it showed you your desire and now he wished he never came into the room.
He couldn't believe that something so horrible existed, such a thing to tempt you and mock you until you're driven insane, he finally understood what the mirror was truly there for and he took a chance at guessing the name. "The Mirror of... Suicide" He spoke out-loud with a hint of humor in his voice, that was the only possible answer he could think of for this mirror, it was meant to drive you to suicide. He continued staring at the person in front of him, the person that stood mocking him, as he tried to gather the courage to leave the room.
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Aife skirted a stone corner, her nose buried deep in a Muggle Victorian novel. The lengthy passageways and wide halls provided a perfect place for her to read, without feeling like an idle duck. She'd conveniently lost Dorian somewhere on the second floor, where he'd become entranced by a line of ants.Deft, spiny fingers rolled the pages ears as their owner scowled in concentration. Not that she'd needed it. This was her fourth run through the book, and she'd memorized almost every significant plot line. Aife turned the leaf, and crossed her hand to the wall, letting her pale digits guide her as she walked blindly through the corridors. She walked swiftly, her eyes scanning the detailed lines in time with the swings of her long, pale legs.
So deep in concentration was she, that Aife barely had time to notice the open door before her, and ran right into the stile of the hard oak plank. She dropped her book, her startled hands launching out to regain her standings. Confused, she looked around as she bent to retrieve the text. The door was far down a lone passageway, she noticed the light was sparse here, and the dusty stone walls seemed highly familiar. She glanced beyond the frame as she rose, and noted the vast room, empty of anything except high, arched windows and a massive mirror.
Aife blanched at the sight, the memory of her first encounter with the glass filling her tangled mind. She turned slowly, quite ready to return to the puzzle of hallways when a thought made her pause. It wasn't as if she had to look at the mirror. And she knew her grandmother was all right, she'd received an owl from her just that morning. Her feet shifted in the direction of the room, and she hesitantly stepped over the threshold.
Before she ventured farther into the room, she realized it was all ready occupied. Aife paused, unsure as to whether she should stay or leave. She glanced at the boy, taking in his impressive height and clean appearance. Usually she was incredibly shy at introducing herself amongst new people. However, it really did help when they were all alone, with only the two of them to notice her short comings. She thought of Lunette, who was so much better than she was at socializing.
Taking a cue from her friend, she thought of a phrase that might make her sound witty, and more sure of herself than she felt. She folded her arms and leaned against the frame of the door. "If you plan on killing yourself any time soon, you might want to gaze in there a little bit longer..." she quipped, pulling absentmindedly on a fiery strand of hair.
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As Caelen stood there staring at the person in the mirror he seemed to relive all of his human memories. Most of them were the ones with his family. He loved his family very much and though he did not agree with their customs, mostly the pure-bloods are superior one, they were still his family. He got along with most of them and even agreed to their arranged marriage to make them happy even though he knew he would hate it. Now looking back at it part of him regretted ever doing anything to make them happy, when he needed them most they more or less banished him. Forbade him from ever contacting them and disowned him. He felt foolish now to actually believe that they would still want him with what he'd become.As he grew up the only words that ever came out of his mother's and fathers mouths were blood related. Marry a pure-blood witch, continue the legacy, have loads of children. They seemed the type to be supporters of Voldemort when he was around but Caelen never asked as that was none of his business. His family's bad reputation with the non-pure blooded almost caused him to be friendless and though he tried to not care about his friends blood status he knew if his parents found out he was friends with muggle borns they would be angry. When he was turned for some reason he thought he could go to his family for help, and of course that was not a good idea. They resented him for what he was, blamed him for ruining his life and the wife of the family who's daughter he was suppose to marry. He was the only son of the family and they blamed for ruining his chances of ever producing an heir. He tried to remember what he was thinking when he decided to go back to them after he became a vampire, he should have known they would have shunned him but part of him believed they loved him to much to do so. Now his eyes were opened, he realized that he couldn't really trust anyone, no matter how much they claimed to love you he would always be something to be feared and hated.
Caelen took a deep breath as he stared into the reflection of what he use to be, he tried to picture if he could have gone back to the day he ran into Bernard would he have done anything different. The answer he came up with ultimately was no, he was never able to turn his back on someone that needed help and even though his good deed on that night turned him into a vampire he was sure he would just do it again. He didn't hate the man for turning him, it wasn't his fault he knew that if he didn't turn him that he would be dead right now. Though he knew that his sire wouldn't be able to live with himself if he had let him die instead, he still wished the guy had chosen that option because now he was stuck as a soulless being and he didn't think he'd ever be able to be happy with that.
Lost in his thoughts he didn't take notice of the person that entered the room until he heard her speak. Caelen turned around quickly to see who spoke to him since it wasn't a voice he recognized. The same instant he cursed himself for letting his mind become to preoccupied to smell or hear her until it was too late. Not that he could have done anything, there was no where to hide in the room and he actually wasn't in the mood to run away right this moment. He slipped his hands into his pockets as he looked at her, she was a little hard to see in the darkness but he made no move to approach her, instead he chose to answer her with his currents thoughts.
"If only it was so easy" He spoke quietly not sure whether or not she heard him. He wasn't suicidal, Bernard had told him from his first week as new fledging that there was very little that can kill him. It wasn't even yet proven if the killing curse could kill a vampire so he never bothered trying to end his immortal life. He took a breath to clear his mind as he tried to return to his smiling nature. Though it was forced he made it a goal to never let anyone catch him while he was down, this girl unfortunately did so he decided to change the subject. "How long have you been stalking me?" He asked looking at her with a small smirk and finally stepped away from the mirror to walk forward.
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The boy turned quickly, catching Aife off guard. His skin was quixotically pale- so much more than hers that it was almost unreal. She inclined her head to hear him- she wasn't sure if she'd heard correctly. His expression changed as he inquired as to how long she'd been there. Trying to think of a witty response to match her first, she paused. It was always harder to follow up on quips, and she for one was the worst at producing them. She shook her head slowly, shrugging her shoulders against the door."Not but a minute, really", Aife told him. Her gaze ventured over his pallid features as she spoke, taking in his slender build and crisp visage. "I was..." she glanced down to the book in her hands. "Reading... and wandering." Her gaze returned to him, and she realized something was different about him. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, and she searched his features as she thought about the prospect. Her eyes landed on his, and with alarm, she noticed the contrast in his eyes.
They reminded her of a time when she'd been hiking in caves. One chamber was long and the ceiling high, and two people could stand side by side without touching. The guides had cautioned their wards and then turned off the lights. As the lights faded, the surrounding area became pitch black, devoid of any possible light. It was so... empty. As if she were entirely alone, despite the fact that her sister stood right next to her.
Aife's eyes widened, as she realized she'd been staring at the young man as she recalled the moment from her past. Her blue orbs fastened to his own, not withdrawing their gaze as she continued. "I'm sorry if I surprised you. It's just that I'm familiar with the mirror..." Her head nodded toward the glass that leaned against the wall. "It isn't anything good, I can tell you that now. It does things to you..."
Aife pulled her gaze reluctantly from his, and looked toward the mirror. It stood so deviously innocent against the cold stones, she wasn't surprised how easily one could be drawn to it. Recalling her manners, Aife extended her palm to greet his. "My name is Aife, by the way. Aife Argent." A smiled played across her lips as she waited for him to respond, her pupils again inspecting his obsidian irises. "You aren't a Rouerie, are you?" she asked.
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As he walked closer to her Caelen started to make out her appearance. The first thing he noticed of course was the beauty in her blue eyes, he supposed it was eyes that he always noticed first because he was so very self conscious over his own. Hers were magnificent and he just felt lost staring into them, they almost lit up the dark room and Caelen felt as if he would be content to gaze into them forever. He noticed the fiery red color of her hair next and smiled, this girl was just full of color and it really stood out from the complexion of her skin. Caelen slipped his hands into his pockets out of habit as he stood some distance from her.A strange expression crossed her face quickly as if she was searching for her next words and Caelen simply stood still waiting for an answer. He was joking of course, trying to lighten the mood and he hoped that his statement hadn't offended her. She shook her head and shrugged her shoulders as if giving up and Caelen rose an eyebrow as to why when she responded. He wasn't surprise that she wasn't standing there long since he would have noticed her of course, but then again his thoughts were so engrossed into his memories that he didn't realize he was there until she spoke and he still cursed himself for that. What good was his enhanced senses if he didn't even use them right.
Caelen let his gaze wander to the book in her hand when hers did before looking up to meet her gaze. Reading and wandering was what lead her to be in the same room with him. That almost seemed like fate playing with him, but than again Caelen didn't believe in such things as fate. Though he did believe in luck... and he decided it was bad luck that lead him to be a vampire and though the girl was very pretty he thought it was also bad luck that caused her to catch him mopping in front of a mirror. As his thoughts wandered Caelen realized that the girl had stop speaking and was most likely awaiting a reply, he turned to answer her when he caught the look on her face. She was staring it was blatantly obvious and Caelen felt a surge of insecurity run through him. There was no mistake she looking at his eyes, they always did and he was afraid to look away as to not seem rude but the more she held his gaze the more he wanted to shield them. It seemed the mirror made his insecurity worse now as it was accompanied by a nice case of paranoia.
She spoke again and Caelen found himself concentrating on not leaving the room, finally she broke his gaze and he released a small breath. She began to talk about the mirror and nodded towards it and Caelen turned to look at the evil thing again. "I've realized that" He said with some humor in his voice when she spoke about the power that the mirror held. He released a breath and turned to look at her as curiosity got the best of him. He knew his question would bring nothing good from her words but he couldn't stop himself from asking. "What do you see when you look into it?" He spoke with a look of seriousness on his face. He really wanted to know, He suppose if it was to see if everyone felt anger towards the mirror like he did or not.
She extended her hand towards him and spoke her name and Caelen gave her a charming smile. Her name was unique, he had to admit but he supposed it fit her in a way. He extended his own to take hers by the tips gently and lifted her hand to his lips to lay a delicate kiss before returning it to her side. "I'm Caelen Sage" He added with a smile and brought his arm to his side also. He didn't really like saying his last name anymore but the name felt empty without it so he used it. "No, not Rouerie" He answered her with the same dazzling smile but then his brows narrowed questioningly. "Though I take offense to that statement, I think I'd make a fine Rouerie" He answered placing a hand on his heart. "But I suppose they didn't want me..." He spoke again with an over dramatic sigh as he glanced at her from the corner of his eyes.
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Aife blushed at Caelen's formal introduction. His name was beautiful, and she had to say, it fit him well. She grinned when he confirmed Rouerie's lacking, and her lips twitched at his further musings. Fighting back a laugh, her hand rose to hide the evidence. "I'm sure the sorting cloak had no idea what it was missing", she said, smiling widely.
Aife thought back to his earlier question. "Actually... I saw my father. And then my grandmother", she began. "It made me think that she was dead... I mean, my father passed when I was young, so I just assumed..." her voice trailed, she thought of that horrible morning in the room, and the mirror's taunting ways. "It drove me crazy. Almost literally..." she conceded. "But she is all right. Really. I think it just shows you what you want the most... or it's supposed to", she claimed. "But I think it is capable of much more..." She stood still, thinking. "It isn't good to get too wrapped up in it."
Aife looked up at Caelen. "What did you see?" she asked. His expression faltered, and she held her hands up. "Don't worry... you don't have to tell me", she said quickly. "I don't mind it." She smiled softly. If he wanted to talk, he could- she was a great listener. But she never pushed people farther than they needed to go. "By the way, what are you doing up here?" she asked. "How did you find this room?"
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Caelen smiled widely as her face turned a crimson color close to the red color of her hair. He brought his hands down and slipped them into his pockets out of habit when she began speaking and returned with a grin of her own. He was only joking about the Rouerie statement of course, he had no doubt that the sorting cloak placed him in the correct house. Though Sournois was often accompanied by the words arrogant and selfish it also held the often distraught, the skeptical and the untrusting which were the 3 words that described the inner workings of Caelen. Well now it did, before he was a vampire he wouldn't have belonged in Sournois at all but you can't undo the past. Well you could with the proper spell or device... but he wasn't able to.She began talking of the mirror and Caelen found himself feeling pity for her. He imagined when she saw her father she felt a sense of longing and since she saw her grandmother also he assumed maybe she was homesick. Either way thinking of the mirror made him angry again, he wondered if he was the only one to have such a reaction to the mirror. Maybe it was because his personality was so complicated, he didn't feel longing over not being human he was just angry that he wasn't and that was the reaction the mirror brought from him. He couldn't imagine himself being driven insane by the mirror since truthfully if Aife hadn't walked in when she did there was a chance he would have broken it regardless of the consequences.
Aife asked him the same question in return and he cursed himself silently. Of course he should have expected such a question but he didn't and he assumed she noticed the change in his thoughts as she dismissed it just as quickly. He sighed softly deciding he owed her an apology, she did reveal to him what she saw so he should do the same to her but he couldn't, not without revealing what he was. Maybe he could lie to her... no that wouldn't be a good idea, he didn't want to start off lying outright to someone he barely knew. "Sorry... it's just very... personal" He spoke with an apologetic look hoping that was enough to sattisfy her for the time being.
Another smile crossed his face at her other question as he tried to think of the best way to make his short and boring tale of finding this room an interesting one. He sighed softly and looked at her with a grin as he spoke. "I was driven out of my common room by an arguing pair..." He began as he tried to remember what the two were talking about before he left. "It was a very interesting tale of quidditch... and I ran far far away and ended up here" He said with a laugh as he watched her. "Curiosity got the best of me, a door at the end of a hallway is always hiding a secret so I came in and found this amazing little mirror of suicide" Caelen grinned using his personal name for the mirror as he glanced at it quickly.
He wondered how something that seemed so insignificant could completely destroy someone's state of ease. He really wished he never came in here but now he wasn't regretting it as much as he just made a new very attractive redhead friend. "I'm in Sournois by the way" He added after a moment as he realized she still wasn't aware of what house he was in. "Does that lessen your opinion of me?" He asked mocking a hurt expression. Sournois weren't known for their niceties and he was sure the other houses resented that particular house.
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Aife nodded, her hands coming up before her. "I understand", she said. "I don't mind not knowing." She offered a smile in proof, and listened as he answered her next question. "You don't like Quidditch?" she asked. "Well you are one of a million- it seems everyone here likes it", she said. Her mind wandered to her mother, who was an avid fan in her own rights.At the mention of the mirror, Aife's gaze turned toward the glass. "It really could be suicidal..." she noted. She looked back up at Caelen. "So are you glad that curiosity bested you?" she asked, her head cocking inquiringly. It was debatable that anyone could be glad to find the mirror, though she had heard of people who'd enjoyed their views. She moved further into the room, looking at the mirror, though avoiding direct contact. It was ironic... how harmless it seemed, even now. She turned, facing Caelen again.
"Oh, you are Sournois, then?" she asked. A smile crossed her features when he asked how her opinion faired. "No, it does nothing to my opinion..." she mused. "I tend to not judge people on their house placement." Aife thought a moment, considering her accumalation of friends at the school. "I do not know a lot of Sournois students, though when I ask after one, people aren't exactly thrilled..." She focussed on Caelen. "Do you think you belong in Sournois?" she asked. "Considering what it is said to stand for? Or do you believe that the house doesn't define the student?"
Aife thought about her own placement. "I guess I would belong to Rouerie regardless", she said, shrugging her shoulders thoughtfully. "I am most certain that Cossu doesn't fit me, and Sournois is probably even more ill fitting. If you think about what they stand for, that is..." she noted.
Aife returned her gaze to Caelen's. "What brings you to Beauxbatons?" she asked. "Besides the obvious, of course... Do you like it here?" She felt curious, and the lack of witnesses emboldened her usually shy manners. "Where are you from, anyway?" she asked, her small white teeth showing through her smiling lips.
Aife stood still, listening as Caelen answered her various questions. She realized she was rambling again, or maybe taking to many liberties. But he could always refuse to answer. She'd have no problem with such. It occurred to her that she wanted to hear him speak. His voice was smooth, and his expressions changed beautifully. His words held her attention, just as the mirror stood ignored behind her.
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